This Is Having Kids

Things My Kids Licked in 2013

1. The slide at McDonald's.
2. Shopping carts at all major grocery stores... and WalMart.
3. Handrails.  All handrails.
4. The dog.
5. Snow.
6. Each others tongues.  In public.
7. The door handle.  Every door handle.
8. The remote.
9. My face.
10. The backs of chairs at any and all public gathering places.
11. Each others faces.
12. Their toes.
13. The drinking fountain.
14. Crayons.
15. Boogers off their faces while sledding.  Who am I kidding?  Eating, licking... potato, potahtoe.
16. Maple syrup off their breakfast plates.
17. The trunk of our tree.
18. The Christmas tree.
19. A rock.
20. My keys.
21. Cake beaters.
22. Have I already mentioned boogers?
23. Bottom of their shoe.
24. The window.
25. A used band-aid.  The dirty, oozy part of the band-aid.

 Things I Hope My Kids Lick in 2014

1. A freakin' vegetable.