The difference in The Bird and The Bean as demonstrated by free samples of an ice cream sandwich at Costco:
The Bean: Immediately shoves the entire quarter of a sandwich into her mouth at once, causing a brain freeze... leading to screams of pain and a wide open mouth full of half-chewed ice cream sandwich which in a desperate attempt to avoid further stares, I blow into... because it seemed like the only solution at the moment.... blowing on ice cream in my nearly 2-year-olds mouth.
The Bird: After delicately nibbling on her ice cream sandwich for five minutes, simple physics occurs and the ice cream melts to the point that it slips out from between the sandwich, which causes a chain reaction of screaming, tears and outright hysteria. Sobs for Mommy to put the melted ice cream back into the sandwich are heard throughout the warehouse and my explanation about why that is simply not possible are met with more screams and heartbreak.
Which is why we now only sample room temperature products at Costco.
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